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Kickball for Jesus

November 4, 2010

I had a brief stint as a softball player in elementary school. I don’t even remember the name of the team, but I do remember receiving a trophy at the end of the season. I was the kid who didn’t pay attention to the game and spent the season playing with my hair in the outfield. Most of my other trophies are for such competitive things as piano recitals or a plaque for designing creative newspaper layouts.

But there is one trophy that rises above them all. A trophy with which I will never part.

A trophy for kickball.

I don’t mean to brag (yes I do), but I was part of the 1992 Word of Life Olympians Kickball Kickoff championship team. We beat out dozens of other teams to take home the title.*

Olympians is a church program (similar to Awana), where you memorize verses and complete a workbook and whatnot. You even got medals based on the number of Bible verses and songs you memorized. God’s gift of salvation may be free, but Olympian medals are not. You have to earn those suckers. We’d meet each week on Wednesday evening to become Olympians for Jesus. You see, we were running the race for Jesus.

But let’s be honest, the most memorable part of each week was the kickball game. Each year the area churches participating in Olympians would have a field day. The churches would participate in games and competitions, the crown jewel being kickball.

When the time came, we were ready. We’d been practicing for weeks, weeding out the weaklings to ensure our team of Christian Olympians could kick the butt of other, weaker teams. It was all in the name of Christ’s kingdom. Jesus doesn’t need weak kickballers. 1992 was our year. We were bringing home the trophy.

Fact: the key to kickball is not the high and far kick—those are too easily caught by outfielders. You want to keep your kick low to the ground so it has to be scooped up and thrown to get you out.

We played kickball throughout the day, eliminating teams like it was the ACC and we were in the middle of our March Madness.

I retired from kickball soon after our championship. I’ve played a few times since then, but I never wanted to embarrass the other players with my mad skills. I mean, Aaron Rodgers probably doesn’t play flag football with neighborhood kids, right?

*I actually have no idea how many teams (churches) were competing. It felt like dozens, though.


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2 Comments leave one →
  1. November 4, 2010 11:09 am

    you are seriously hilarious.

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