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Eleven Signs You’ve Hit a Creative Slump

August 25, 2011

1. You become jealous of people who are sick enough to stay in bed and watch movies all day.

2. You begin wondering if browsing sites to look at other people’s creativity counts even just a little toward being creative.

3. You can’t think of any more points for your list, so you try to think of a joke.

4. You experience your first earthquake, in central NC of all places, but still can’t think of anything creative to write about.

5. A grasshopper walks into a bar, and the bartender says “Hey, we serve a drink named after you!” And the grasshopper says “Really, you have a drink named Fred?”

6. You start to become jealous of grasshopper Fred because would you have thought of such a witty response to the bartender?

7. Your mind starts to wander and you concoct a theory about grasshoppers. Maybe aliens came to earth, used gamma rays to shrink all the dinosaurs, and horribly ugly grasshoppers are really just shrunken dinosaurs. Mystery of disappearing dinosaurs: solved. Next case Ghostwriter.

8. You re-read what you’ve written and begin questioning whether you should be allowed to write things that the public can read.

9. Then you remember they just added “sexting” to the dictionary and realize that writing is a universal art open to idiots of all kinds, so you’re free and clear.

10. You begin to wonder if you should just give in to the slump and go watch YouTube videos or browse Pinterest for several hours.

11. You wake up from a 7-hour web-browsing zone-out and realize that somewhere in between watching the music video for “You Spin Me ‘Round” and reading an article on making homemade lip balm, you may have had a great idea, but it was body-blocked by a funny cat video.

3 Comments leave one →
  1. August 25, 2011 5:27 pm

    Do you know how many times in a day I get body-blocked by a cat video? More than a few.

  2. Schniff Schnaff Shalomie permalink
    September 2, 2011 6:35 pm

    I’m assuming you’re referring to the “literal version” of that music video.

  3. Schniff Schnaff Shalomie permalink
    September 2, 2011 6:35 pm

    Just saying.

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