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So a guy walks down the road with a grill…

August 31, 2011

Here’s the scenario, kids. I’m driving to the grocery store and using a back road to get there. This “back road” isn’t really a back road since it’s still in town, but it’s two lanes with houses and small businesses on each side. I’m about to turn toward the highway when I’m met with this visual situation.

A family of four is walking down the road. The two kids are boys under the age of six. Each boy is carrying a bookbag that is too big for them (as all bookbags are until kids reach about fourth grade). The mom looks ticked off and is walking entirely too close to the road and the father is dressed like a biker, complete with bandana on head.

Here’s the weird thing. The dad is carrying a charcoal grill over his back, and the mom is carrying the grill lid. At 1:30 on a Wednesday afternoon. So, of course, I tried to imagine what in tarnation made this scenario even possible. Here are a few I came up with:

– The family is walking to the local school to protest the decline of public education by burning their schoolbooks on the grill.

– They’re foodies who refuse to eat meat unless they grill it on their own grill with artisan spices. The bookbags are full of grilling supplies and spices.

– They are the worst campers in the world and forgot everything except clean underwear (in the bookbags) and their grill.

– They’re walking to a nearby park to break the law by using their own grill.

– They’re fleeing from the authorities and in defiance of The Man, the father grabbed whatever he could. Once he picked up the grill, he realized he couldn’t really carry anything else and ran out of time to pick something else to carry. Plus, he really likes grilling.

– The grill is a housewarming gift for a friend. Clearly the husband’s idea because his wife would have thought about the fact that they’re walking to the party and she would have gotten them a gift card to go buy their own grill (hence the ticked-off expression).

– The grill is actually a transforming spacecraft and the people are actually shapeshifting aliens. Before coming to earth, they thought a spacecraft disguised as a grill was pretty slick. Then they got here and realized they should have chosen something easier to carry around. Like an iPhone. Or a car. The car probably would have saved them from a lot of awkward conversations.

Any scenarios you’d like to add? Come on! It’s fun!

One Comment leave one →
  1. Your Mama permalink
    August 31, 2011 6:48 pm

    I can not imagine why someone would be walking – as a family- with a grill…maybe the parents were going to school to head up a welcome back to school cook out.

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